Sometimes, you tend to take a lot of things for granted. Your family, good friends, your comforts in life, so on. I love my family – my dad, mom and sisters. But more often than not, I take them for granted. Yeah, I love them a lot…but I don’t always think about it or feel lucky (except when I see less fortunate ones). However, life has this amazing way of coming up with situations or instances that open my eyes to the wonderful family I’m blessed with. Something of that sort happened recently. I was just struck by the realization and overcome by this overwhelming happiness.
My parents aren’t exactly what I would call broad-minded. Of course, they are very much so, when compared to so many other people I know. But not as much as I would like them to be. 😀 I mean, they wouldn’t really be able to understand my perceptions about fulfilling my purpose in life, religion (HELL!!NO!!), relationships, marriage, so on. Though I love them a hell lot, I’m not very close with them on a personal level. And I tell my friends about how my parents won’t be able to understand me. But this recent incident just made me realize that I haven’t been able to understand my parents completely, particularly my dad. He knows me a lot more than I gave him credit for. I’m really surprised and of course, so damn happy. 🙂
Well…this is what happened. I have been thinking a lot about doing something in journalism (print media). I would love to work in a magazine, something creative, something I will enjoy and love doing. So, I have been checking out some possible courses and when I came across something I liked, I e-mailed my sister telling her about it. I told her to talk to dad about it & give him the details. I knew he would say something about how I keep changing my decisions, jumping from one to the other, playing with my future, blah blah (you know what I’m talking about!). I wasn’t expecting any kind of positive response from him. The maximum I could expect, I guessed, would be the usual “Let’s see” (which happens to be my dad’s favourite response to anything and everything, ie. if he doesn’t say NO straightaway! :P).
So, next day, I was reading my sister’s reply. When she got to the part about talking to dad, she said that she told dad about my journalism thing. When she heard his reply, she said her reaction was ‘WTF’!!!! I assumed he must have said something about how irresponsible and immature I’m being, can’t stick to a decision… in short, the usual stuff. I continued reading the mail for details of his reaction. This was his reaction, as quoted by my sis in the mail: “She should write and think of, maybe, getting her books published… instead she wants to go for journalism!” I can imagine my sister, standing there, open-mouthed, listening to him say that!!! 🙂 She asked him if he didn’t have a problem with that. He replied, asking why he should have a problem…he said that I should write and become a good writer someday. That was the last thing I expected him to say! He has always encouraged me to write but I never thought he would want me to pursue a career in writing. Parents mostly don’t think art is a field which ensures enough job security and opportunities to prosper for their children and don’t encourage a career in those lines. So, I was honestly surprised at my dad’s reaction. And…extremely HAPPY! 🙂 It felt so damn good knowing that I can always count on him to support my decisions in life.
I thought I knew him…but now, I realize I have never been able to know him completely, not yet, atleast. This incident made me see how I have taken him for granted all this while…never seeing that he understood me well enough to know what I want, what I will be happy doing. I cannot explain the admiration I feel for him… It’s like, suddenly, I have begun to actually ‘see’ him, like I never saw him truly till this day. I feel a deep sense of respect and love for him… for having been there for me all this while, for having given me the freedom to choose what I want in life, for loving me so much, even after all the crap I have done (which have, I’m sure, hurt him a lot!)…basically, for being the dad that he is!!! 🙂
To dad: I hope you read this someday. I want you to know how grateful I’m to you for all that you have done, are doing and will be doing (I presume) for me. You are the best! I don’t know if I’ll succeed but I will certainly try to be a good daughter, though I doubt I will ever be the kind of daughter you deserve to have. 🙂 I know I have hurt you a lot more than you admit, I’m sorry for all that. I love you a lot for knowing & understanding me, letting me be what I am…and for being what you are… and actually, all I want to let you know is: I love you a lot. You are the best dad ever! And I’m the luckiest daughter ever! 🙂 Love you.
Here’s to all dads, for their undying, unconditional love and support!! 🙂
[I guess this means I’ll have to write something for mom, very soon. I can already hear the phone ringing… 😀 :D]