Sometimes Parents Choose NOT To Talk…

When I opened up this page to type out a new post, I had a completely different topic in mind. I was dying to write about it. But then, there were some random blogs I had stumbled upon and thought I’d read them before writing the post. And while reading one such post, I was moved so much that I wanted to write about it right away!

The post I read – When A Mommy and Daddy Love Each Other Very Much – is by a journalism major, which is why I was drawn to the blog, in the first place (I have a thing for journalism, you see!). And when I read this post, I realized that I could relate to what she was talking about…they were so similar to what I felt regarding the issue. And the issue I’m talking about is sex/sex-education.

I DO NOT understand why sex is a taboo topic even now! Particularly, in a family (with special reference to Indian families)! When a kid enters teen/adolescent years or attains puberty, it is natural to be curious about sex. All of us have gone through the same phase. So, why do parents reproach kids for raising sex-related questions? Why are kids forbidden from talking out loud about it?

Frankly, I think parents and teachers are responsible for educating their children/students on sex. Because how much ever they try to deny or ignore it, sex is a part of our lives, part of our basic instincts. And kids, as part of growing up, can have a lot of wrong concepts about it…not to mention, a hell lot of curiosity! I knew a grown-up girl who actually believed kissing could get her pregnant…and trust me when I say I’ve heard worse! I don’t get it. Who else should be telling them the right concepts…their friends? Well, not that friends can’t do it right! Because it wasn’t from my parents or teachers or any elder that I learnt about it! Even though I’m no parent or authority on the subject, I’m doing what I can so that others don’t end up in the same situation. For instance, since I know my mom won’t be having this talk with my little sister, I do it. And she has complete freedom to ask me anything she wants to know. I might not know it all in entirety but atleast, I’m able to tell her what she needs to know!

It’s high time that parents and teachers tried to impart the necessary knowledge related to sex, particularly the need for safe sex, to teenagers. Because they need it. And it is, after all, your responsibility to guide them on the right path. And, NO, just sending them to school doesn’t ensure they are on the right path. The subjects they study at school aren’t helpful enough to prevent one of them from ending up with an unintentional pregnancy! Instead of letting them get all the wrong ideas and end up in trouble, take it on yourself to  give them the right kind of information. If you find it difficult to talk about, you could try asking someone else to talk to them, preferably someone the child is comfortable with. Or you could even try providing them with some useful books. Do what you can, in your own way. Don’t give yourself any opportunities to regret, later in life. I’m sure your child will thank you for it…maybe not right now, but, someday eventually, for sure! 🙂

10 thoughts on “Sometimes Parents Choose NOT To Talk…

  1. Gr8 post rosh. Awesome read. I agree wid evry wrd. Parents need to undrstnd. As for me. Its only post my engagement tht my mom has opened up wid me n I ws lyk ur tellin me nw as if I duno nethn. Evn in skools, my teachers always skip the lessons abt such topic n nt include them in d syllabus. But tht nvr stopd us frm readin it lol. All d elders need to actuali grow up..!

    • True, Saba! Even my mom talks to me as if she just realized I’m grown up and need to be told about all this! But, I guess this experience will atleast help in making you a better mom! 😛

  2. I believe talking about sex with kids is essential however I want to be the one to do it. There are so many notions and opinions and I know my child will formulate his/her own views but first I want to instill my values and that in my opinion is not for teachers, government or anyone else to do. It’s my job and I want to do it before their friends, some pervert or they see something online (probably a Tumblr site) gives them some ideas that distorts their perception of what a healthy and mature sexual relationship is like. And when it should begin.

    • I think it’s incredibly good that you want to take the responsibility on yourself. Because, nowadays, not many would do that! 🙂 I’m sure you’ll make an awesome father! 🙂

  3. I was fortunate to have a Mom who was open about the subject. I certainly didn’t learn it from school. Back in the late 60s, our guidance teacher thought it prudent to tell us girls that we ‘should not go into the bedroom with a boy’ because we might get pregnant! Is this the best she could do? There were at least 3 girls I knew who had to quit school because they were pregnant and I bet they didn’t ‘do it’ in a bedroom! lol

    My mom gave me a book when I was about 8 or 9 that talked about the changes that were coming and another book about ‘where babies come from’. She also used to tell me to make sure there was a condom present, or go on ‘the pill’. She didn’t want an unplanned pregnancy spoiling my life. I gave my daughter the same advice – and made sure my son knew to have condoms if he was planning that kind of activity. It is important that we arm our children with the necessary information about such a vital topic so it doesn’t ruin (or at the very least, complicate) their future. Great post! 🙂

    • It’s awesome to know you liked the post, more so because you’re a parent and I guess you’d know what I’m talking about. And I hope all parents would try to follow your example! 🙂

  4. Loved this post, my parents never saw a problem with discussing sex but I had many friends who didn’t understand basic facts about sex or any of the issues surrounding it, I think they would have preferred to be able to speak frankly with their parents!

    • Friends who didn’t understand basic facts about sex…? Sounds a lot like some girls I knew! 😀 Anyway, I’m glad you didn’t have to go through that.

  5. Thank you so much for linking to my post. It makes me so happy that it inspired you to write you own and share these thoughts, thoughts that I think need to be heard. I abandoned my blog a few months because I got too caught up with school and going abroad but your comments really make me want to return to it. So thanks! And I’ve really enjoyed looking through your posts 😀

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