Figuring Out

Everyday, I open up the ‘Add New Post’ page, thinking the sight of it might inspire me or push me to write out something. But it has been nearly two weeks now. Ann told me that I must blog something today. And then, I found this Freshly Pressed post today, in which the blogger experiences a similar lack of  inspiration to write (due to different reasons, though). In my case, I just don’t find that spark, that inner need to write, to let out my thoughts. I do have stuff to say, but I just can’t seem to find the will to do it.

I’m trying to figure out what I should do next, in terms of a course/further studies. I want to let myself take time and come up with it, but meanwhile, it kind of depresses me to think that I’m in the middle of nowhere, right now…with no idea of where to turn to, what to do next. I’m sure it’s normal, but I’m still trying to come to terms with it. So, I suppose all that inner turmoil is the actual culprit behind my lack of motivation.

Someone once told me that we don’t really need to be taught anything; all that we need to know or learn is within us. It might be true, because sometimes when a person tells me something, I get this feeling that I had already known it, and just needed someone to remind me of it.

I had been unable to understand why I was so moody and disturbed. And then, while reading ‘Like the Flowing River’ by Paulo Coelho, I came across this situation (a comparison to life) in it, and it struck me: “This is my problem! I knew it all along but I needed to be reminded, be told about it (in this case, read it).” So, this was what enlightened me –

“The Persian poet Rumi once said that life is like being sent by a king to another country in order to carry out a particular task. The person sent may do a hundred other things in that other country, but if he or she fails to fulfill the particular task he or she was charged with, it is as if nothing had been done.”

The age-old problem of finding one’s purpose in life. I realized that I’m plagued disturbed. Because I couldn’t figure out what exactly I was supposed to do. That constant feeling of ‘something missing’ or

Found this online. LOVED it! 🙂 Made me smile!

‘something not right’ – that’s what is disturbing me. And I also realize that it is upto me to put it right. And that it can’t be forced. So, while that goes on, I’m trying to enjoy this phase. Trying to get over the sense of loneliness and purpose-less-ness.

I’m sure all of you must have gone through this. So, tell me, how did you get over it or sort it out? 

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11 thoughts on “Figuring Out

  1. Conditions like these, that are long-lasting and tend to wear us out, are not easily fixed. For a moment, we might feel inspired by other people’s solutions – but they might necessarily not work for us. Even though on a fundamental level, we work in the same way, we have developed so much intellectually that we all have different needs.

    I can personally say that for me, summer and traveling are the best remedies to any long-term “blue-ness”. See where I live, it’s dark and cold most part of the year, so as soon as the days start to grow longer and hotter, my mood is immediately improved. That might not be in your case, as you probably get enough Vitamin D all year round :P.

    Traveling is also something that boosts up my energy, because I get to go somewhere completely different where I can’t really predict what’s going to happen. And that relaxes me somehow. Not to mention the relief in not having any obligations or scheduled events! Have you thought of going somewhere? Many people also find motivation in a change of environment.

    I hope you find YOUR solution though, and this little empty phase in your life blows over soon!

    • Rinth, I loved the thoughts you have put across. Being inspired by another’s solutions momentarily, finding that it doesn’t work for you…because even though all of us work in the same way fundamentally, we have different needs, intellectually. That is exactly what I’ve been experiencing. I love the solutions people come up with, but somehow, they just don’t seem to work for me, because probably, my intellectual needs are different. I’m trying to understand how I could fulfill those needs (could use some help!).
      It’s winter here, right now. So, I miss sunshine, too. I loved your ideas about summer and travelling. The latter is doubtful, as of now. But let’s see. I’ll keep you posted. And thank you so so so much for the reply (and awesome thoughts). 🙂

  2. Pingback: I Always Get One+One=Two :D | Hira Nazir

  3. My son is going through the same phase as you. He quit his courses at the local College, tried odd jobs, but hasn’t found anything he’s really passionate about, at the moment. He’s not the sort who really gets ‘fired up’ about anything, a ‘doom and gloom’ sort of kid who wanders the internet and finding all kinds of disturbing things. He worries that the global economy will collapse and thinks he should learn survivalist stuff like how to grow his own food. That’s all well and good. I’d love for him to go out into the yard and create a vegetable garden! Instead, he watches videos on-line. He’s talked about learning more about ‘green’ options, things like environmentally friendly energy solutions & garbage disposal techniques that don’t damage the land, but hasn’t actually signed up for classes in this field. I hope he finds something he wants to do soon.

    Hope you don’t have as much trouble finding direction in your life. 🙂

    • I totally relate to your son’s situation. Even I have so many interests and read up bits and pieces on them, but never do anything substantial. Finding direction in life can be tricky, when there’s so much you want to try. 😀

      • In this day and age, one may have several changes in careers over time. I think the days of drudging through 40 years in the same job are pretty much over – unless it’s something you really love.

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