Someone And Me

 

I always have weird moments of revelation. Like, one moment of sudden clarity and I see something I’ve been overlooking.

I came across (more like stumbled across) someone. I don’t want to say someone ‘special’ because that would be so cliché. Special is no longer very special, I guess. So, like I said, I’ve come across someone. Someone I knew for a long time. I used to see this person on a daily basis (or so), once upon a time. And the first time we communicated was two weeks ago. It’s super weird. But life has its own ways of bringing people together, when the time is right.

So, this someone and I have been exchanging mails; started chatting recently. And we have realized how similar our interests and thoughts are. Our conversations are unique, amusing. We talk about thoughts, beliefs, experiences… We share bits of new information, send each other interesting links and songs. And he introduced me to two awesome sites! One of them is 8tracks.com and I’m already in love with it. 

So, what drove me to write this post? I was wondering what to blog about, while listening to songs (in the above mentioned site) and reading a post (the ‘someone’ shared the link to the post – What others leave for you to keep). It talks about relationships, the role people play in our lives. And it struck me – all that I was doing was somehow connected to this someone. The song, the article, the thought. And I knew I should be blogging about this.

About how people come into your life. And leave, someday, sooner or later. When they leave, you retain a bit of them; you know they have changed your life. Sometimes, when someone steps into your life, you know they are bound to leave. Yet you let them become a seamless part of your days. You make it difficult for yourself to let go, to let them leave.

I’ve made some new friends. And the best one (among them) has chosen to leave, already. We no longer have awesome conversations or share experiences. The friendship we had has come down to occasional smiles and random greetings, sometimes extending into a “How are you?” I can’t explain how it happened, but it did. Perhaps, the person was meant to leave, and all I can do is let go. Let go of a person who has touched me in ways beyond comprehension. But then, when you think about it…maybe people leave to make way for others to enter your life.

I don’t know when this ‘someone’ will step out of my life. For now, I love the bond we share. The links. The words. The music. The thoughts.

Meme-Time !! :)

One of my blog-friends – Tom Baker from Morningerection – has been doing a Meme for the past couple of years. And guess what? I’m part of it this year! Basically, what it means is some 20 questions are collected and bloggers participating in the meme are supposed to answer them in a blog post. These are the questions and my answers for the meme of July 2012.
Meme July 2012
1. When you were a child what was the hardest or scariest thing in the world (i.e. movie, book, chore, etc.) to you that as an adult is neither hard nor scary?
Ans. As a child, I was scared of the dark and the scariest thing was when I had to go into a dark room or pass through a dark corridor! I guess all of us might have experienced this at some point or the other. Thankfully, I have grown out of that fear.
 2. If you were offered the chance to be a cooking star on a Food Network show, which of these three would you choose for a mentor: Bobby Flay, Giada de Laurentis or Alton Brown?
Ans. I don’t know any of them. But even with a mentor, I don’t think I’d exactly shine as a ‘cooking’ star (I’m so not into cooking!). 
3. What is your favorite theme offered by your blogging platform that you are not using and what theme do you absolutely hate? Provide links to both along with your explanation.
Ans. From the few themes I’ve checked out, I loved Beach and Fruit-shake, because  they are such bright themes, with  lot of colours! Why I don’t use it…well, I guess I’m really comfortable with the current theme I’ve chosen. I just don’t feel like changing it. 🙂 
I don’t hate any themes. But my least favourites would be Piano Black and Monochrome. They both seem too dark and dull. I’ve felt that they kinda take the fun out of reading. I did use Monochrome initially but found it too dull for my taste.
4. Who is someone from your past that you are sorry you lost track of?
Ans. There are a lot of people whom I lost track of (by the way, I’ve regained contact with some through FB), but nobody special enough to feel sorry about. But there’s this favourite teacher of mine  – Sangeetha ma’am – who left school, and now, I have no idea where she is. And I feel sad about having lost track of her. She’s the only one I can remember right now.
5. What would you take to a deserted island?
Ans. My diary and pen, if I get to take only one thing. If I can take more, then..well, there will definitely be lots more. 🙂
6. If you could get into the mind  of anyone (living or dead) and read all their thoughts, whose mind would you choose to raid?
Ans.  There are a lot of people whose minds I would have loved to peek into. But, for now, I’d like to go for Hitler. I find him fascinating in a very odd way and would like to get into his mind, read his thoughts and kinda…know him. 
7. What are the entire contents of the top drawer of the table directly next to your side of the bed?
Ans.  Lots of books and some magazines.
8. What is the one thing you have in your dorm, apartment, or house that you never want your parents to find.
Ans. I have a bag which has all my previous diaries. I’d never want my parents to find it!!!!
9. Your daughter is having a sleepover for her 12th birthday. Around 8:00 pm a thunderstorm knocks out power. How do you entertain twelve pre-teen girls when all the cell-phone batteries have died?
Ans. I would join in with the fun and go all crazy with them (I’m sure I’ll be really young & stupid at heart even when I’m a parent!)… We could sing out crazy songs at the top of our voices, have a game of ‘Truth or Dare’ (it’s always fun, especially in the dark!!), maybe tell some scary stories (if the girls are up for it!)…lot of options! 
10. What aspect/trait about your personality are you most sensitive about (as in, you wouldn’t stand anyone criticizing about this one aspect)?
Ans. I hate people commenting on how I need to eat more, get healthier! I love the way I’m. Basically, I hate it when people make fun of anything related to my appearance. I suppose that’s natural. Also, I love healthy comments but I cannot stand anyone making fun or unnecessarily criticizing my writing (blog included).
11. Mr. Tom Baker has had two previous virtual nude dinner parties. He is now inviting you, his blogger friends to his home for a real nude dinner party. This is not a virtual dinner party; it is the real thing with all expenses paid and the usual five course dinner prepared by him. Will you or will you not be present at said nude party?
Ans. Sorry, Tom. But I don’t think I’ll be able to make it. 
12. What one piece of movie memorabilia from which movie would you love to own?
Ans. Harry Potter’s Invisibility Cloak 🙂 Always wanted it, ever since I read about it and saw it in the movie! 
13. If literary characters were real and you could interview any one of them, who would it be and what’s the first question you would ask?
Ans. There are a lot of characters I would love to talk to (interview sounds too serious!). First one to come to my mind right now (because I was talking about this last day) is Mycroft Holmes, Sherlock Holmes’ brother. And the first question I’d ask him – “Are you single?” Because I truly love Mycroft; he’s one literary character I’d love to date! 😉  And yes, Robert Langdon, too! 
14. If you had to choose a theme song for yourself from only the Classical genre, which song would it be?
Ans. I’m not familiar with songs in the Classical genre. So, I don’t think I can answer this question. But, if I could choose any song, the first song to come to mind is ‘Soulmate’ by Natasha Beddingfield. Whenever I hear that song, I think it’s so ME, so much like what I have in my head. 
15. What is your most quirky habit?
Ans. I’ve a few quirky habits. My favourite one is – I’m addicted to the question/word “Why”. I cannot stay for long without asking ‘Why’ even if the situation/context is stupid. 
16. When was the last time you took the time to act like a child and what did you do?
Ans. I think I (almost) always act like a child. I always blurt out nonsense like kids, end up doing a lot of crazy stuff, love getting into silly troubles, ask silly questions… 
17. If there was ever a past relationship, (friend or otherwise), that you could go back and mend, would you? Who would it be with, and why?
Ans. Yes. There was this guy who was one of my closest friends in college. But we grew apart because of certain issues. By the time we tried to talk, it was too late; our worlds had grown too far apart. So, if I could go back and mend a relationship, I would mend our friendship. Because I miss it a lot!
18. What would you do if all of your followers left comments daily and would be it be too much for you to handle? Would you hire someone to answer comments for you?
Ans. I’d only be happy if my followers started doing that. It would never be too much for me to handle. And hire someone to answer comments? Hell, NO!
19. Do you know how far back your ancestry goes on either side of your family tree? How far?
Ans. Uhh…this is embarrassing, but I’m afraid I know only until my grandparents, on either side! Nothing beyond it. I’ve heard my dad talk about his grandparents, does that count? 
20. If you could compare yourself to anything in the universe, what would you compare yourself to? Why?
Ans. I’d choose to compare myself to the Phoenix. Like the mythical bird that ignites itself at the end of its life span and then is reborn from its ashes, I’m a person who is constantly reborn from my own depression and suffering. Everytime I encounter sorrow, I try to derive strength from that pain and come back to life. 🙂 

Blah Blah from the Whirlwind Zone

The past few days have been something like a whirlwind. Now, when I look back, all of it seems to have blended together and I’ve lost track of what happened when. I don’t seem to have time for anything, but ask me what I’m busy with and I have no answer to that! This place (the whole locality, not just my home) does not have life, especially not when you’re away from people you love. So, being busy helps me take my mind off other (read: depressing) thoughts.

Over the past few days, I’ve had some experiences revolving around friendship. A recent friend of mine – someone whom I know through chats and mails for the past two months or so – chose to be completely honest with me. It was unexpected because he is a stranger and I’d never have found out the truth. And, to be frank, it wouldn’t have mattered much even if he hadn’t told me. But he did. And I loved him for that. That shows how much he respected our friendship.

Another person who was supposedly something akin to a best friend did something that I wouldn’t even dream of doing to a best

BFFs 🙂

friend. Again showing the person’s respect for our friendship. And the third incident…I got a new friend, through another awesome friend of mine. From what I’ve felt so far, we seem to be connecting very well. I was feeling kinda low when we spoke today (I didn’t tell him that, though). Anyway, talking to him distracted me enough to make me laugh and feel better. 🙂 It takes time to identify good friends…and don’t even ask about true friends. Those are rare species!

I was chatting with Ann today. I miss her so much, I miss our stupidities, crazy times, silly fights, everything. As if to add to my despair, almost everything around me reminds me of home. Right when I’m trying to forget. In the past one week, today was the first time I truly & seriously wished that I hadn’t come back, that I hadn’t left home. Not just because I miss Ann. There’s a lot more to it. But then, how would I get to experience something new if I stayed in the comfort zone of my home sweet home? How else would I know what it feels like to be part of a whirlwind (job-hunting, home-hunting, blah blah)? Atleast, that’s what I tell to console myself. 🙂

[While thinking of a suitable title, I connected my habit of rambling and the whirlwind I’m in…and TADAAA! I got a crazy, stupid title! Please excuse the absurdity for now, this was the best I could come up with!]

Memoirs of a (Creatively Messy) Roommate

I know it’s been a few days since I wrote something. Janet (my younger sister) left on 6th. And I’ve been too emotionally distracted to actually sit down and write anything. I miss her a lot. I’ve noticed that when there’s someone with you for a while and then they leave, it feels so painful. And even though you maybe used to being alone, you still miss the person very badly, and the solitude hurts in ways you can’t explain. Anyway, I don’t think I should go into that right now.

Today, I read a post that gave some ideas on how not to let blogging take up too much of your time (that is, if you don’t seem to have time for anything else). Simple yet different and effective ideas. One was that once in a while, you could post a photo and write a paragraph about it. I loved the idea. And it inspired me to think of another one. We meet so many people in our daily lives…friends, strangers, so many people. And I’m sure there will be something about them (quality, habit, behaviour, anything) that comes to mind when we think of each person. Blog about that; do you like it, elaborate on the specific characteristic, how it affects you (if it does), so on. I’m going to put these ideas to use when I go blank and don’t know what to write about. Of course, there can never be a dearth of interesting people in your life! 😀

Last night, I was copying some numbers from my phone into a diary and Ann was sleepily reading through some book (for school). I came across a friend’s number…and that evoked a hell lot of memories. I spoke to Ann about this friend for a while and she shared a similar experience with me.

The person I’m talking about, she was my hostel roommate, while in college. For 2 years! We are shuffled every year, but sometimes, we might get one or two of our ex-roommates. And that’s how I got Jisha as my roommate twice, during the second and third years. Talking about Jisha, she isn’t exactly my type of person. We aren’t best friends; far from it, in fact. To be honest, during the first year as roommates, I used to get constantly irritated by her. She was (nearly) obsessed with everything being clean and…you know, I hate it when someone forces me to clean my space. Not that I’m untidy. Like I always say, I like my own creative order. And Jisha used to think it’s messy. So, we did have our tiffs initially.

But, eventually, as time passed, all 5 of us (roommates) got closer to each other. We used to have a lot of late-night talks, discussions on everything from movies to current affairs to the usual class gossips. And, with time, I got used to Jisha. There were certain things I disliked in her, but everyone has flaws. And her’s was nothing I couldn’t overlook. Because she has so many other positive qualities that I still admire. Apart from her amazing knowledge of current affairs and stuff, she is a very good person at heart. She is extremely helpful, goes out of her way to help people, compassionate beyond limits, patient, rational, capable of getting things done, quick at learning new stuff, hardworking and a lot more. In short, a very awesome person!

When we became roommates during the third year, both of us were really happy about it. She is one person I miss a lot, whenever I think of the times at hostel. Even though we weren’t close in a personal way, the two years had led us to grow comfortable with each other. We had got so comfortable and used to each other. She knew my habits, my likes and dislikes and I knew hers. She knew when I didn’t want to be disturbed, I knew when she didn’t want my constant barrage of questions. There are a LOT of other things I could tell you about our friendship (like the numerous memories that never fail to make me smile, or even laugh out loud!) . But, basically, what I wanted to put through is how we were never close yet knew each other and were comfortable with each other, almost like close friends.

Before I came to RAK, Jisha had called me. I was surprised, because I hadn’t expected her to call, honestly! Anyway, when she did, I was extremely happy and our conversation had an intimacy that I hadn’t noticed before. When I told Ann about my bond with Jisha, she said she has a similar friend – someone who isn’t personally close but knows her so well and is very comfortable with her. Sometimes, sharing space with someone for a certain period of time is enough to develop a strong bond, almost similar to the one between best friends. You grow so used to the other’s presence, his/her habits, likes, dislikes and quirks…and most importantly, sharing space will also mean you create a lot of memories together…like Jisha and I did. Memories that will live forever!

Have you ever had someone like that in your life? 

 

Meet-ups & Memories :)

Guess what? I met up with Saba on Wednesday! We were seeing each other after a year and a half (almost half, that is). And it was super-awesome! 🙂 I loved it. We met at her place. And even though we didn’t do anything much except talk and eat, I loved the few hours I spent with her. In fact, I couldn’t believe it when it was time for me to leave. And we hadn’t even begun to talk, like you know, talk talk. We had been catching up on each other’s lives, talking about ex-classmates and my future plans…we had just begun! 😦

It’s always been like that. Every time I’m with Saba, time seems to pass ever so fast…and before we know it, hours would have gone by like minutes! Anyway, she lives nearby now. So, I guess that means lots more meet-ups! 🙂

It’s always such a delight to meet someone so dear to you, after so long. And even though so much time has passed by, you still feel the same…and you kinda know, deep within, that things will always be the same. 🙂 Even though you grow older or whatever, some bonds don’t change.

Today, I spent a lot of time talking to my youngest sister – Ann. I was telling her about my school time memories and fun. About this sir who was so not like a teacher, how he changed so suddenly and then we tried to get back at him by trying to break his chair (didn’t work out, anyway!). About the super-mad boys in my class (12 Std.) who used to say such crazy stuff that I could never go through a single hour without laughing out (atleast once). School was so much fun…even though we didn’t really realize it then. Miss those times! I suppose I’ll be saying the same about college, quite soon (or maybe, I’ve already started)! 🙂

 

Friends Who Care – a Rare Species :)

While it feels great being back at home, my writing has taken a backseat since I got here. It’s been ages since I wrote my diary; actually, it’s been long since I wrote anything at all… I know I should get to it, but I get caught up with other activities and hardly find the peace I need to sit and write.

On the day before I had to leave, I was text-messaging some friends from college. And…well, I got to learn a lot of things that I never knew about them. I realized that I have gained some friends in life who might not be very close to me, who might not be my BFFs but who still love me and consider me a good friend of theirs. I was touched! One among them is Martin. We have always been good friends, even though not on the personal level. I enjoy being with him and will always cherish our silly fights. He was one of the first persons to read my blog and follow it! Whenever he felt I was kinda low, he used to come ask me what the matter was. He is one friend I will miss, now that college is over! 😦

I also happened to have some intriguing experiences with certain individuals on that day… I don’t think I can explain all that, though. Anyway, next morning, I had to leave from home by around 5am. Sometime around then, while in the car, I was surprised to find messages pouring in from some friends, asking me whether I had left from home, when the flight was, so on. I mean, they had actually woken up early (for some reason or the other) and cared to ask me where I was. I can’t say the same for some of my friends who were supposedly part of ‘my gang’. Anyway, this incident kinda opened my eyes to who among my friends actually cared about me and who didn’t. Not that I needed a confirmation about who didn’t. But the other category – those who did care – included a couple (or more) of unexpected people. That, again, was touching. 

So, moral of the story? Look around you. You might be too into a certain friend circle/gang or a particular friend, and might be overlooking someone who truly cares about you. Don’t lose a true friend, especially not for someone who doesn’t care half much as that person does! Sometimes, it takes time for us to realize how much we mean to someone…but don’t let it be too late! 🙂

Miles Away, Yet Near…

I logged in around two hours ago and (you might find this a little hard to believe) since then, I have been hooked (actually, still am) to the computer screen. I have been reading some random blogs. I find one interesting link in the first blog, jump onto that, notice another one there, go on to that and by now, I think I have gone through so many of those random blogs. I managed to find some REALLY good ones, anyway! 🙂 I don’t know about you but I’m a blogaholic and make it a point to go through the posts that are Freshly Pressed. I have noticed that they may not always be all that great. Sometimes, after reading certain Freshly Pressed posts, I have wondered what exactly the WP people were thinking when they chose it for the homepage! Anyway, I loved the ones that were Freshly Pressed today. Really interesting! 🙂 Someday, I’m hoping I will be featured on that list, too. Someday (wistful sigh).

Since it’s exam time out here, there’s nothing much happening with me. It’s mostly just sleep, eat, sit in front of a book, talk and some loafing around. And yes, blogging. 🙂 Can’t do without it. Lot of plans are being considered since we have only some 2 weeks left. All of us want to go out, spend time together and, basically, have some (more) great time before we leave. Somehow, with all that I have on my mind, I don’t feel all that enthusiastic because I know it will be super-hard squeezing in time for those hangouts.

During the past few days, while I was at Merlin’s, my first ex called me up. It was unexpected. Not in the wrong way, though. We are still good friends and keep in touch. We don’t talk very often but when we do, we catch up on each other’s lives and talk about school times, common friends, so on. This time, he called at a very ‘appropriate’ time. I had just had a quarrel (over the phone) with my sister and I was hurt and angry. Emotionally down. When he called, I was glad to have something else to think about. We spoke about his present relationship, college life, old school friends, memories…so much that I forgot all about what was distressing me until then. I was feeling so good after the conversation and sent him a text message saying so. He replied saying that he didn’t have to talk to me everyday to keep in touch with me, that just one occasional call was enough to give him happiness that could last for a year. I was surprised to find that I agreed with him! 🙂

Some friendships are like that. You may not be in constant contact with each other. You may not even know where the other person is right now. But sometime when you need them (or at very random instances), they appear out of nowhere. And give you a hell lot of happiness. Even though you have been out of touch for so long, somehow, the distance always turns out to be irrelevant. Because those conversations that happen once in a while are enough to destroy the distance that came up  in between. Inspite of all that gap, you never seem to lose the bond you had with them…the spark never seems to be lost. 🙂 Those friendships are the ones that should be cherished, treasured for life.

All of us have similar stories…stories of friends who are faraway, but who share a very special bond with you, even though you don’t get to talk much. Friends who can bring back the magic in your friendship every time you talk, even if it maybe after months or years. They always remain in that special place at the back of our head, never really fading off with time. Always there, always sure to pop out with some wonderful memories of times gone by, with intermittent calls and convos. If, right now, you are thinking about that distant friend of yours, why not give them a call, just to say hi or that you miss them or that you love them, or that you’re glad they are part of your life? 🙂 Go ahead! You’ll thank me for it! 🙂 Have a great day!