Silence, Voice, Clouds

Not so long ago, there was a time when I felt smothered by the voices all around me. And I felt I couldn’t find my own voice amidst all the commotion. Last day, I had an experience which was exactly opposite to the other.

Sometime towards the end of the day at work, I was feeling really dull and drained. I needed a break, very badly. So, I stepped out of the office. The window right outside my office opens up onto a mini-balcony (or something like that). I go out there, at times, to watch the rain or, like today, to take a break. There was a colleague standing near the window, looking outside. I spoke to him for a few minutes, someone else came by and he moved onto another conversation. All the while, even when I was talking, I wasn’t really paying attention to the person or the talk.

I was looking around, taking in the sights with an intensity that surprised me. There were a lot of dark clouds, signifying impending rain. I spent a long time looking at the buildings around, the clouds, the people on the road, the clouds, the greenery in the distance, the clouds, the sky. Mostly the clouds. I watched this guy, on the street below, crossing the road, weaving his way through the evening rush of vehicles. It reminded me of a maze; I smiled when he found his way out at the other end. Somehow, it didn’t seem as life-threatening as it really is.

Tired of looking at the buildings around, I lifted my gaze up to the sky, the clouds. I took my own time, admiring the breathtaking shades of grey and white in the clouds, enjoying the slight breeze. I wondered if I would get drenched, on the way home from work. A lot of thoughts passed through my mind. Meaningful lines I had read in a book, people in my life, words spoken, incidents, so many thoughts. I thought of how I could feel a happiness and peace that had been lacking in the past two weeks. I reflected on the reason for this new-found joy.

After spending some time, lost in thoughts, when I came back to my senses, I realized that I had been having a quiet talk with my inner voice. Inspite of all the noise (vehicle horns blaring, colleagues talking, blah blah), I had found a calm silence within. I could hear my inner voice so clearly, feel a silence that conquered the noise around me. This is what I meant when I said that I had gone through an experience completely opposite to the one mentioned in the earlier post. I found an amazing sense of inner calm and clarity of voice, even while surrounded by commotion. And it’s like I’ve found myself all over again, learning to listen to my thoughts over the clamour of others’. After all, awesome things happen to awesome people! [Since I was so overwhelmed by the whole thing, I got a colleague to take some photos of the cloudy sky. Hope you like them.]

So, have you ever lost and/or found your voice? And do you feel fascinated by clouds? 🙂 Happy weekend, people!

 

Why I Love The Solitary Reaper

A couple of days ago, I read this post in Amit (Personal Concerns)’s blog – The Solitary Reaper. In fact, I’m writing this post, based on an idea that he (Amit) gave me. I studied learnt this poem when I was in 9th or 10th Grade. Even though I don’t remember when I studied it, I so clearly remember the poem, the beauty of it and how much I loved it. Sometimes, mostly while travelling, when I see random but interesting/amusing sights/people, I let my mind wander… I think of what one person must be thinking about, what kind of life another person must be leading, why someone looks happy, where someone else must be going to. Well, you get the idea. William Wordsworth, in this poem, has done something akin to it. Maybe that’s why I love it so much. Picking out a random but beautiful sight – a solitary reaper in the field – and weaving thoughts about her…wondering what she must be thinking, what she must be singing… It was just a sight, on the way. But look at the beauty of the thoughts!

And the imagery used…absolutely splendid! I LOVE (LOVE LOVE LOVE) the way Wordsworth has compared the solitary reaper’s song to some other  wonderful melodies. What struck me so much is the way he has described these different songs. The lines are written so remarkably that I could picture it all so easily. And the comparison is excellent. Imagine a song that sounds like ‘nightingales singing welcome notes to weary travellers in a shady haunt, among Arabian sands’…or a song ‘in springtime from the cuckoo bird, breaking the silence of the seas’. Can’t you just see it in your mind’s eye? And, well, he (Wordsworth) leaves no doubt about how good the reaper’s song must have been! 🙂

Then, he moves onto try a hand at guessing what the song could be about. Do I have to tell you how amazing the lines are? I’m sure there are people better qualified than me to talk about its artistry and elegance. But I can’t stop feeling awed by the sheer perfection of those lines…and the way he goes from one possibility to the other – the song could be about old, unhappy things, battles of the past or it could be about a familiar matter of the present, a natural sorrow, loss or pain (‘That has been, and maybe again’ – I LOVE that line!).  Battles and natural sorrow? Both are such distinct images  but he brings them together, seamlessly flowing from one to the other with mere words!

And, at last, after all the comparisons and conjectures, the poet continues on his way, bearing the song in his heart. What an incredible ending! Even after all these years, I still feel the same awe that I felt when my English teacher first explained this poem to us, in school. Guess that will never change. 🙂 When I sat down to write (read: type) this post, I had another idea in my head. But, once I began talking about this poem I found that I couldn’t stop. And well, this is how it ended up! 🙂 I know I’m no  great poet to speak so authoritatively about a poem by Wordsworth! But these were just my thoughts on a poem I love, what I felt when I read it.

So, which is the one (or more) poem(s) that you love so much that you can’t stop talking about it? One that never ceases to awe you?