Of Palms, Feet & Spaces

Yesterday, I went out with my housemate, her brother and my sister (Janet). It was tiring, but enlightening in some ways. We went to this book fair, spent time checking out books… It’s always bliss to have books all around me! We had lunch, roamed around a bit, blah blah. It was past 5pm or so when we got back home. Completely drained and dead tired.

The enlightenment was more like an insight into myself. While travelling in the bus, on the way to some part of the city, I realized that I have a kind of claustrophobia. It’s not that I’m always afraid of all closed/cramped/tight places. For instance, I’m not at all uncomfortable while using an elevator. But then, sometimes, when I see walls all around me or can’t see beyond to an open space, I feel this rush of anxiety, a weird sense of suffocation. I was surprised when it struck me; I had never noticed it until now.

How I came to realize this fact about myself – While the bus was passing by a building, the wall was visible right outside the window (to my right). I could just reach out and feel its rough surface. And when I looked to my left, there were people crowding around, and I couldn’t see beyond the wall of human bodies. I felt like I’d begin to suffocate…a clutch of panic in my mind. That was when I understood that I’m claustrophobic, to some extent.

Another enlightenment I had was in the book fair, when I chanced upon a certain book. During the past couple of days, I’ve been talking, reading and thinking a lot about certain unconventional fields of study – astrology, palmistry. What drew me to them is the fact that they combine science (which I LOVE LOVE LOVE) and ethereal, metaphysical elements (which I find intriguing).

At the book fair, yesterday, I saw this book – The Complete Illustrated Guide to Palmistry. I flipped through it, stopping for longer on some pages; the images, texts and concepts all jumping out at my inquisitive mind. Apart from the fact that it was detailed, illustrated and written in an interesting way, I loved the book because of the sheer curiosity it awakened in me. Anyone who saw me could have seen the unmasked excitement on my face!

I’m sure my face must have looked even more animated when I found another book below the palmistry one – The Complete Illustrated Guide to Reflexology. I have always liked the concept of reflexology but didn’t know anything much about it. Beyond the basics, that is. So, seeing the book, I went through it, trying to get a deeper idea of a topic I like. And, I was surprised to find myself going on turning pages, falling in love with the book. I loved the illustrations, explaining how to massage, where and how to apply pressure at the right points for the right reasons.

When I moved towards my sister and away from the book, I felt this longing, pulling me back… I had fallen in love with the book. I had discovered interest and zeal for something so unexpected. And I knew I wanted to learn, know more about it.. So, I’ve been trying to get more information on the subject, checking out possible courses, blah blah. And I couldn’t help sharing it with y’all. 🙂

As far as work is concerned, the bad phase is slowly starting to brighten up. I just completed my first major event, quite successfully. More on that later! I’m still demotivated, more or less, but I’m sure that will pass. Janet is here for a couple of weeks, so it feels really good. I’ve become aware of the presence of an awesome friend. I’ve been having a lot of chocolate. 🙂 Seems like good times are just around the corner.

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Memoirs of a (Creatively Messy) Roommate

I know it’s been a few days since I wrote something. Janet (my younger sister) left on 6th. And I’ve been too emotionally distracted to actually sit down and write anything. I miss her a lot. I’ve noticed that when there’s someone with you for a while and then they leave, it feels so painful. And even though you maybe used to being alone, you still miss the person very badly, and the solitude hurts in ways you can’t explain. Anyway, I don’t think I should go into that right now.

Today, I read a post that gave some ideas on how not to let blogging take up too much of your time (that is, if you don’t seem to have time for anything else). Simple yet different and effective ideas. One was that once in a while, you could post a photo and write a paragraph about it. I loved the idea. And it inspired me to think of another one. We meet so many people in our daily lives…friends, strangers, so many people. And I’m sure there will be something about them (quality, habit, behaviour, anything) that comes to mind when we think of each person. Blog about that; do you like it, elaborate on the specific characteristic, how it affects you (if it does), so on. I’m going to put these ideas to use when I go blank and don’t know what to write about. Of course, there can never be a dearth of interesting people in your life! 😀

Last night, I was copying some numbers from my phone into a diary and Ann was sleepily reading through some book (for school). I came across a friend’s number…and that evoked a hell lot of memories. I spoke to Ann about this friend for a while and she shared a similar experience with me.

The person I’m talking about, she was my hostel roommate, while in college. For 2 years! We are shuffled every year, but sometimes, we might get one or two of our ex-roommates. And that’s how I got Jisha as my roommate twice, during the second and third years. Talking about Jisha, she isn’t exactly my type of person. We aren’t best friends; far from it, in fact. To be honest, during the first year as roommates, I used to get constantly irritated by her. She was (nearly) obsessed with everything being clean and…you know, I hate it when someone forces me to clean my space. Not that I’m untidy. Like I always say, I like my own creative order. And Jisha used to think it’s messy. So, we did have our tiffs initially.

But, eventually, as time passed, all 5 of us (roommates) got closer to each other. We used to have a lot of late-night talks, discussions on everything from movies to current affairs to the usual class gossips. And, with time, I got used to Jisha. There were certain things I disliked in her, but everyone has flaws. And her’s was nothing I couldn’t overlook. Because she has so many other positive qualities that I still admire. Apart from her amazing knowledge of current affairs and stuff, she is a very good person at heart. She is extremely helpful, goes out of her way to help people, compassionate beyond limits, patient, rational, capable of getting things done, quick at learning new stuff, hardworking and a lot more. In short, a very awesome person!

When we became roommates during the third year, both of us were really happy about it. She is one person I miss a lot, whenever I think of the times at hostel. Even though we weren’t close in a personal way, the two years had led us to grow comfortable with each other. We had got so comfortable and used to each other. She knew my habits, my likes and dislikes and I knew hers. She knew when I didn’t want to be disturbed, I knew when she didn’t want my constant barrage of questions. There are a LOT of other things I could tell you about our friendship (like the numerous memories that never fail to make me smile, or even laugh out loud!) . But, basically, what I wanted to put through is how we were never close yet knew each other and were comfortable with each other, almost like close friends.

Before I came to RAK, Jisha had called me. I was surprised, because I hadn’t expected her to call, honestly! Anyway, when she did, I was extremely happy and our conversation had an intimacy that I hadn’t noticed before. When I told Ann about my bond with Jisha, she said she has a similar friend – someone who isn’t personally close but knows her so well and is very comfortable with her. Sometimes, sharing space with someone for a certain period of time is enough to develop a strong bond, almost similar to the one between best friends. You grow so used to the other’s presence, his/her habits, likes, dislikes and quirks…and most importantly, sharing space will also mean you create a lot of memories together…like Jisha and I did. Memories that will live forever!

Have you ever had someone like that in your life?